Interfaith Marriages
In the name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful
Muslim men and women are told to seek faithful spouses with a
strong, good belief, and not allow non-Muslim standards of
selection influence them.
Muslim men can marry only Muslim, Christian, or Jewish chaste
women, while Muslim women can marry only chaste Muslim men.
Allah (s.w.t.) said: {{This day are (all) good things made
lawful for you. The food of those who have received the
Scripture is lawful for you, and your food is lawful for
them. And so are the virtuous women of the believers and the
virtuous women of those who have received the Scripture
before you (lawful for you) when you give them their
marriage portions and live with them in honor, not in
fornication, nor taking them as secret concubines. Whoso
denies the faith, his work is vain and he will be among the
losers in the Hereafter.}} [Al-Qur'an: Al-Ma'idah (5:5)].
A Muslim man is discouraged from marrying a non-Muslim woman if
there is no Islamic State or if he is not living in an existing
Islamic state, since the non-Islamic states do not recognize his
rights as head of the family to raise the children Islamically.
On the contrary, the children will most likely be brought up in
their mother's religion, since the Muslim husband does not have
his Islamic rights in his non-Muslim wife's country.
There are many tragic examples of Muslim men who tried to take
their children to their Muslim countries after they divorced
non-Muslim wives. The women in many of these cases succeeded in
bringing the children back to be raised in the non-Islamic
societies as non-Muslims. The fathers are referred to as
kidnappers (of their own children) in the non-Islamic media.
Unfortunately, even the governments in Muslim countries these
days help the non-Muslim wives to get custody of the children.
This is due to the absence of an Islamic state which would
protect Muslim children from being kidnapped by non-Muslim wives
to be raised as non-Muslims.
Muslim men should consider these issues before they marry
non-Muslim women, especially when the man is strongly influenced
by her physical appearance. A Muslim man should look to the
future and consider his duties toward his children. The cases
mentioned show clearly the damage that can be done to children
in interfaith marriages, and while a personal sin may be easy to
forget and repent from, one may never overcome the problems that
arise because his children were raised as non-Muslims as a
result of his negligence concerning providing the right spouse
and community for them. Children have the right to be brought up
in an Islamic environment by good Muslim parents.
The benefits of marrying a non-Muslim woman are minimal when
both live in a non-Islamic state. The woman and her relatives
would not see how Muslims live as a community, nor would they
have close contact with family, should the Muslim man decide to
marry her and live outside the Islamic State. Marrying a chaste
Christian or Jewish woman in a non-Islamic state should be
considered as a last resort and as the only alternative to keep
him from falling into adultery. Men, however, should be aware of
the fact that most women in non-Islamic societies do not qualify
as chaste women in Islam, (i.e. abstention from unlawful sexual
activities). Some Muslim men ignore these conditions and ignore
the commands of Allah when they are misled and fooled by a smile
from a non-Muslim woman.
Abdullah Ibn `Abbas, a famous companion of the Prophet
(s.a.w.) and a famous scholar, said that Muslim men should
not marry Christian or Jewish women from people who are
enemies of Islam.
Dr. Yusuf Al-Qaradhawi, a contemporary Muslim scholar, said that
the Christian or Jewish women can be married only if the four
conditions summarized below are satisfied:
She must be Kitabiyyah, i.e. Christian or Jewish by faith, and
not by virtue of birth into a Christian or Jewish family. Many
women who live in Christian or Jewish societies today are
atheists, Buddhists or Bahai's. These women are prohibited for
Muslim men. A woman who commits apostasy, by becoming a
non-Muslim after being a Muslim, would not be allowed to marry a
Muslim man, since apostasy is much worse than unbelief.
She must be Muhsanah, which means chaste and virtuous. Women who
are involved in illicit relationships with men are prohibited
for Muslim men. Most non-Muslim women these days do not qualify
as Muhsanat (chaste and virtuous women who abstain from sexual
activities outside marriage), and Muslim men should fear Allah
and keep this condition in mind.
The woman should not be from people who are fighting Islam or
are helping others to fight Islam. Since Israel is at war with
Islam, all Jews around the world are helping Israel, Muslim men
should not marry Jewish women is she is from people who help
Israel.
There should be no threat or possible harm from marrying her.
For example, if a man's children would not be raised as Muslims,
he should not marry her. If the courts in a non-Islamic society
would give the children to her in the case of divorce, then he
cannot marry her, unless she agrees that he would have the
children in the case of divorce.
Dr. Yusuf Al-Qaradhawi also said that Muslim men may not marry
Christian or Jewish women if the Muslim community is a small
minority in a huge non-Muslim society, and such marriages would
make it impossible for Muslim women to find Muslim men to marry.
This is classified under "limiting the allowed" in the Islamic
jurisprudence. Dr. Yusuf Al-Qaradhawi used the example that if
all people grew cotton instead of wheat, the government would
have the right to stop them from doing so, since wheat is a
necessary food ingredient, even though growing cotton is allowed
in normal cases.
Non-Muslim women who repent and accept Islam are treated as any
other Muslim if their acceptance of Islam is sincere and not
merely for the purpose of marrying Muslim men. Islam forgives
all that was before it. Some people, however, accept Islam by
name only to marry a Muslim, without showing the least change in
their lifestyles to prove that they are following Islam. One
should not marry from such people.
There are many Muslim girls of a marriageable age who are living
in non-Islamic countries, and it is the duty of the Muslim men
to protect these girls from marrying non-Muslim men, which is
absolutely prohibited in Islam. If Muslim men loosely practice
their right to marry Christian or Jewish women, the Muslims
girls in non-Islamic societies will be forced into unwanted
circumstances and Muslim men will be at least partially
responsible and will get their share of the punishment from
Allah.
In considering marriage to a non-Muslim woman a man should
remember that marriage is more than the private marital
relationship. A good Muslim woman would provide her husband with
total security, comfort, trust, tranquility, and happiness, and
would raise the children as good Muslims. A man would not have
to see his children taken to a church every Sunday without being
able to prevent it or live with the concern that his wife would
teach his children un-Islamic traditions. It is much easier to
trust a Muslim woman than to trust a non-Muslim woman who does
not fear Allah, and know that He is watching her all the time.
And certainly a woman who does not fear Allah, who sees and
knows everything, will not fear or obey her husband who is only
home in the evenings.
Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) said: {A woman is chosen as a wife
for her wealth, beauty, family, and faith. Win the one that
has the faith or you would ruin your life.} (Al-Bukhari and
Muslim).
The following verses from the Qur'an beautifully give us the
guidelines for selecting the right spouse:
Allah (s.w.t.) said: {{Do not marry Mushrik women
(idolatresses) until they believe; a slave woman who
believes is better than a free woman who does not believe,
even though (the idolatress) woman may appear very
attractive to you. (Likewise) Do not marry (your girls) to
Mushrik men (idolaters) until they believe; a slave man who
believes is better than an unbeliever, even though he (the
Mushrik) may attract you. These Mushriks invite you to the
fire, but Allah, by His Grace, invites you to His Jannah
(Heaven), and forgives by His leave, and (Allah) makes clear
His messages to people so that they might bear them into
mind.}} [Al-Qur'an: Al-Baqarah (2:221)].
Wassalam!.
posted by Muhammad Sabreen @ 12:07 AM
2 Comments
May Allah's Blessings be Upon you, Wassalam!